Eliza Naumann was a young girl; around 10-12 years old. She saw herself as rather ordinary. Or, rather, her father [Saul] saw her as rather ordinary. He saw her older brother, Adam, as quite talented in a number of areas, but saw in Eliza no special abilities whatsoever. Except for spelling; but no one paid any attention to that. But then there was a spelling bee in her class at school. She won! Her father did not notice until she begged for a ride to the regional contest one Saturday. She won that, and her father gave her much praise. In fact, he began to feel tremendous pride in his daughter. Soon, he was ignoring Adam and lavishing every spare moment on Eliza.

She was thrilled. She had felt so dull in an accomplished family. Dad was a professor of Jewish mysticism; Mom was a lawyer. Adam played a musical instrument and was excelling in Hebrew classes at the Temple.

Being given so much attention by Dad made her feel so loved and so special.

Eliza won the next level of the spelling bee, and would be going to the national contest! Her name was in the paper, and the bright kids at school invited her to join them at lunch. Life was good. That is, until it started falling apart.

It was hard to see that at first, however. She and Dad spent hours every day in his study. They went through dictionaries, and learned about word derivations and meanings. Then Saul brought something new to their lessons: Jewish mysticism. Or, specifically, the work of Abraham Abulafia, who had lived from 1240 to 1292.

He wrote: The world of letters is the real bliss. He said that the pronunciation of letters and then of words set off a Divine vibration. If one moved every deeper into this great mystery, one could talk with God.

Saul didn’t tell her all that at first, but only that she could allow the sounds to unfold in her mind.

She was irritated at her Dad’s pressure on this, but when she was on stage at the national contest, she began to grasp the point, as she saw letters in her mind glowing and dancing. However, she didn’t know how to use this method, and was eliminated at an advanced point in the contest.

Eliza was grief stricken; believing she had let down her Dad and the family. However, Saul held out the hope of next year – telling her she could be perfect by then.

And so a year of exploring Jewish mysticism began. Saul taught her how to shut off her intellect, and just allow herself to experience the energy of each letter as it unfolded in her mind. He let her read his own translation of one of the beginning books of Abulafia.

Eliza practiced the many exercises Abulafia wrote about, and found herself opening ever more deeply to the mystical state.

She comes to discover that the letters feel different. … “I” thickens her skin, and “F” makes her feel liquid, that “Q” fills her head with beautiful glass beads until she can only hear them clicking together. [p. 156].

Saul explained:

Abulafia believed that, by concentrating on letters, the mind could loose itself from its shackles to commune with a presence greater than itself, what Abraham Abulafia called “Shefa” – the influx.

He went on to tell her, gently:

I think you have what Abulafia had, Eliza, something he took for granted when he wrote his books. You have the ability to use his exercises as he intended, as a means toward achieving “Shefa.” … Once you’re able to let the letters guide you through any word you are given, you will be ready to receive “Shefa.”

Eliza whispered: Do you mean that I’ll be able to talk to God?

Saul moved close to her and said in a whisper: It’s impossible to describe. But from what Abulafia wrote, it seems less like talking than a special kind of listening.

Eliza is dumbfounded. And you think I could do it?

Saul says, in all my life, you’re the only person I’ve encountered who might have a chance. [p. 173]. Even Saul himself had never been able to achieve this.

Eager to talk with God, Eliza threw herself in experiential learning of the sounds and vibrations in letters.

That summer, Eliza and Saul spent hours together every day in his study. Saul completely abandoned his times with Adam, playing music and learning Hebrew. His ignored his wife even more than usual. So while Saul and Eliza are closed in the study, Adam secretly begins to explore a Hare Krishna sect and Miriam finds her secret “obsessive-compulsive disorder” spinning out of control.

I don’t want to tell you all that happens, because you might to read Bee Season: A Novel by Myla Goldberg, or see the acclaimed movie based on it.

What is important to know is that as Eliza moves deeper into the exploration of Jewish mysticism, the family becomes more dysfunctional. Saul has little time to help her with her lessons, so she secretly begins to read the books on his shelf by Abulafia. She moves to deeper levels of mystical awareness through the experience of the vibrations in letters. She goes far deeper than her father wanted her to; at least by herself and so rapidly.

She reads: If you should hear a voice; loud or soft; or see any image before you, you have been received by God or his highest angels.

She becomes discouraged. After hours exploring mystical bliss, she had not been able to hear a voice or see an image. In her despair, she suddenly noticed loud or soft. She had been expecting a thunder bolt. Actually, she has long been hearing the soft voices of the letters. She has been received by God! She can move even deeper.

She begins to think about all she can accomplish with God’s attention. She can patch up her ailing family. She can get better grades in school, and get more kids to like her.

As the school year begins, Adam has run off to live with the Hare Krishna’s, and Miriam is arrested for shoplifting and sent to a mental hospital.

No one pays any attention as Eliza continues to sneak Abulafia’s books from her father’s shelf. She knows she is at the heart of mystery when she reads:

Remove your shoes from your feet, for the place on which you stand is hallowed ground.

She eagerly takes off her sneakers, and continues the chants she is learning.

Soon it is the night before the spelling bee begins again, in her classroom. She chants deeper and deeper, until she is no longer the one chanting, but rather hearing the chants. She is no longer a separate being, but is part of the great oneness. She is no longer “Eliza”, but rather a part of the great Eternal Mystery. There is absolute bliss and peace. Until, that is, she realizes she is returning … and must return to her individual existence as “Eliza” in her one body. She is frightened, realizing that she can never return to the “Eliza” she was; but will be transformed in some unknown way. She falls asleep.

When she awakens, she is back as “Eliza”, but not the same one she had been. As she gets ready to start again, the spelling bee in school, she has a far deeper and more spiritual understanding of what it means, and what her role in it is. Here is where you need to read the book or watch the movie to see how the new Eliza; or rather Eliza God; approaches her life and her family.

So, yes, the details of this fictional character are in the book and the movie. But the story itself is a universal one of seeking for God; of feeling alone in the world and wanting to have God’s help in creating a better life. Through sincere seeking, one can eventually find oneself open to the Divine that is in all things.

But, then, having found the Divine, one is not the same person with the same goals. You realize that you are a part of the Divine, and you can no longer look at life through the eyes of a single individual. You have become a part of All That Is, and you see your life very differently.

I think we all have had some times of feeling a part of a larger whole. For most of us, it is a process of many years, with little bits of awareness at a time. Eliza’s was far more dramatic; taking place in less than a year – and especially in one night. But then, it is a fictional story!

For most of us, the reality is slower and harder to discern. But there is difference in letting go of seeing your life as “me”, and realizing it is “God and me.”

To connect with God is start becoming different. The “you” who wants to connect with the Divine is not the same “you” who starts experiencing those connections.

Consider your own faith journey. What have been your times of greatest peace? Prayer? Meditation? Chanting? Listening to music? Painting a picture? Walking by the ocean?

Whatever they are, consider how you are changed by each moment of knowing that you are part of the Eternal One. It may not even be perceptible in the moment, but over time you can see yourself expanding in love for others and the wisdom of how to live with love in your life.

How do you see yourself being transformed, as you allow more of God into your heart? Swedenborg talks about “influx”, just as Abulafia speaks of “Shefa.” There are many ways to understand and experience the Divine. Swedenborg talks of becoming aware of our integration with Divine as we follow a spiritual journey [which he calls “regeneration.”] Wisdom and Love become inseparable within us, and that becomes clear through how we live each day.

Try noticing your everyday life, to see where you are living as “God and me” or “Wisdom and Love” integrated. You may take for granted the countless ways that you are different through your spiritual journey. We often don’t notice it, since it is so gradual. But allow yourself to reflect on the little transformations every day as you allow more of God to shine forth through you and into the world.




 

CLOSING SONG
This Little Light of Mine
African Children's Choir
August, 2008; NYC